Dating young can be a positive experience. It’s the coming-of-age, all-consuming love that we’ve watched and admired while growing up. You share passion with another person and get to experience love like never before. However, this is also a time to get to know yourself, gradually developing your own repertoire and self-identity. A relationship can still be viable during this process, but not many people understand how to balance maintaining their own identity while being with a partner. Below is a list that will remain an open tab until the day I get married. Until then, here are the principles I follow when dating.
1.
Hold onto your hobbies and interests
Your hobbies and interests are aspects of life you should continuously nurture. They play a crucial role in shaping your identity, reflecting your values, and bringing you happiness. Understanding what truly brings you joy allows you to share it with your partner while ensuring that you don’t depend solely on them for fulfillment, entertainment, or a sense of purpose.
2.
Have other relationships
No, I don’t mean an open relationship. What I mean is maintaining the other important relationships in your life—your girlfriends, siblings, parents, cousins, everyone who has been there for you long before this person entered your life. While your new partner may naturally become a priority, and you’ll want to spend as much time with them as possible, it’s essential to remember and cherish those who’ve stood by you through thick and thin. Don’t forget to nourish these relationships as well, because they deserve your time and attention just as much, and they will help keep you grounded in your reality.
3.
Encourage one another in their goals
I know the first two points emphasize independence and doing your own thing, but that’s not my objective at all. Having your own identity and still having a way you want to present yourself is equally as important as supporting and encouraging your partner. That being said, we are individuals before anything. We have our own goals, desires, and aspirations that defines who we are, independent of others. Being in a relationship means to support these dreams of our partner and to create a shared path that respects both individual identities while fostering growth together. It’s about encouraging each other, all while building a connection that enhances both lives. This could look like involving yourself in your partners interests, being curious about what drives them, and finding joy in their passions. It means actively participating in their journey, offering support and creating moments where both of your worlds intersect.
4.
Finding a balance in the real world
Being with your partner is the most special feeling in the world, it makes you feel like you’re the only two people on this earth. However, having a balance of this irreplaceable alone time, while also being connected to your community and society is necessary for the growth of both people. Trying new experiences not only brings the relationship closer, but reflects how the two of you are as a couple in a new environment. You can choose to stay in the comfort of familiar routines, or you can embrace the opportunity to grow yourselves as a couple and explore unfamiliar situations together.